I didn’t want to write something personal on my blog but the past 25days have been emotionally, mentally and physically draining that I felt maybe I would feel better putting it down in words. The last 25days have been crazy. My very cheerful, always smiling and happy Father-in-law was diagnosed with intermediate stage cancer. The first thought that struck me was why Him?? I guess all of us feel that way when a storm strikes. This question kept ringing in my head,but I found no answers. Most of the times, we don’t have answers for questions we have. My Father-in-law was scheduled to have an intense,complex surgery to get rid of the cancer. Three days prior to the surgery he became really quiet. I think he had a lot of questions too unanswered on his mind.A day before the surgery he gave me a book to read and said “Nobody else will read this book, but I know you will”.
On the day of surgery as well he was quiet, he didn’t say anything. While he was being wheeled out to the OT he remained calm, he didn’t look at anyone. Before the OT doors shut I think he looked at my Mother-in-law with a reassurance “I’ll be fine, don’t worry”. My Mother-in-law had tears in her eyes, we left her alone for a few minutes to calm down and she said “He will be fine”.
We all kept telling ourselves he will be fine but deep within all of us were worried. The surgery was a very complex surgery,took almost 8 hours for the surgery to finish. Those 8 hrs were testing times. We all tried to distract each other, my husband found the hospital food to be bad, he said how do people even eat this kind of food. In the tense situation we were, the husband suddenly blurted out ” I want to have biryani”, all of us looked at him and started laughing. Its good to lighten up in such moments. 8 hrs later the surgeon operating, came out and told us the surgery was a success. It was such a sigh of relief. Few hours later each one of us got to see Uncle in the ICU. When I saw him there lying in a sedative state, I didn’t like it. I’ve always seen him with a smile on his face, to see him in pain was really hard on all of us I guess.
We retired back to our room and were relaxed that now he should be well out on the road to recovery. After a few hours the surgeon called us and told us there was some complication and they may have to reoperate. Our hearts sank, all of us had the same question”Why, what could have gone wrong now”. We had to be strong. At that moment I kept telling myself “All will be well”. This kept me going and helped me stay put. The whole night was a testing time. Uncle’s condition stabilised over the night and he started getting better. Few days post surgery when he started recovering slowly and had his trademark smile, it was a ray of hope for all of us.The surgeon said his recovery was remarkable, maybe because he’s such a positive and strong person. But at times, something has to go wrong when everything seems right. Due to medical negligence from the hospital staff Uncle’s recovery took a backstep. There were complications and he contracted an infection. The last few days have been insane and every day we only wished that things would fall into place. Today after a long time there was a green positive signal and Uncle’s condition is stabilising now. A hope that everything will be fine. We all live in HOPE don’t we. It’s still a long way till Uncle gets back on his feet but there is hope and positivity he will be fine.
At many instances I felt, would it help if I had blasted the nurse who was negligent. No, I don’t think so it would have only made me feel worst. I also want to mention, I have no anger on the nurse who was careless and negligent, I just wish and hope you don’t do this to any other patient. I hope you realise that life is precious and every patient that walks into your care has a family waiting for their wellbeing. I hope you realise that human life is a gift and it cannot be played around.
It’s really strange cuz as humans we all make mistakes, learn from our mistakes but in the medical field mistakes cannot happen, a mistake is unpardonable. Oh by the way I am a medical professional too and in the last 25days there wasn’t a single minute when I didn’t think “How I wish Indian Medical System” was far more better. Being on the other side of knowing everything has its setbacks as well, you need to be calm and composed.
I am writing this post sitting in the hospital and all I can think of is why was he made to go through all this?? But it also made me realise in such situations we need to stay positive and be strong. Family is strength and without the support of our families and friends we couldn’t have gone through this tough time.God has his own way of testing your inner strength. Don’t loose hope. We haven’t slept for almost 3 weeks now but it really didn’t matter to us. We only wanted Uncle to be fine.Life is full of ups and downs. Don’t give up, fight your battle and emerge a winner.Its still a long way till Uncle is back on his feet but we are positive he will be well.From here on its a long road to recovery for Uncle but I wish he gets back on his feet soon. I drew this doodle at the hospital, it gave me some kind of reassurance every time I looked at it.
Like many of my readers know, I have taken upto running lately and its really strange but I have been wanting to put on my running shoes and go for a run in the last 3 weeks. I’ve actually missed Running. Strange know in the weirdest of situations you realise on the other good things you want to do in life. Life is weird that way, sometimes good,sometimes bad but nevertheless beautiful!!!
Get Well Soon Uncle!! I miss your Facebook Posts.
Love and Laughter always